Is it natural? With every heartbreak, there’s a need to reflect? Maybe it’s just me. A few years ago, I met this woman on an dating app.* We hit it off well. Our first conversation involved a case of mistaken identity. The perfect meetcute for the modern age. Of course, there was a problem. I …

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One. I’m not good at this. That should be painfully obvious. Like stepping-on-a-Lego-buried-deep-in-shagged-carpet-in-the-middle-of-the-night obvious. Like running-a-marathon-after-a-year-of-being-a-couch-potato-and-wondering-“What-the-fuck-was-I-thinking?” kind of obvious. It’s taking-up-the-Bird-Box-Challenge-and-taking-an-evening-stroll-on-the-expressway kind of obvious. It’s like reading-then-watching-every-adaptation-of-The-Diary-of-Anne-Frank-and-hoping-this-time-it-will-be-different kind of obvious. Two. I’m allergic to pineapple. And kiwi. But I will eat kiwi more times than not. Say, we’re at a fancy dinner. I’m dressed up …

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Someone, sometime ago, decided children speaking in baby talk is cute. I beg to differ. If a child is too old to speak with a mock speech impediment, then it’s not cool. Besides, what does that say about a person with the actual, no-fooling impediment? Homophobic dating service, eHarmony is now running an ad featuring …

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I never understood my fellow man’s constant need of hitting on women. In high school, while most of my friends were trying to get laid, I spent my time perfecting my humanistic qualities. That’s not to say, I didn’t notice girls my age. I did. They were remarkable creatures filled with so much emotion that it …

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