Personal

“boxed in and labeled”

Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

New Introduction

I made a conscious decision scheduling this post for the tail-end of Pride Month. For starters, today is Pride Day. It just seemed appropriate for the post. I chose today because it feels that everyone makes the bigger deal at the beginning of June. That’s when we see the most corporate marketing for Pride. That’s when we see influencers beating their chests about how much an ally they are. As the month winds down, people who aren’t a part of the community just stop caring. There’s no financial gain to it.

With that said, this is not the original intro to this post. The original intro consisted of a story of a friend coming out to me. While I kept that friend’s name secret, I nonetheless began to have second thoughts. I only have so many friends and it wouldn’t take too much a detective to figure out who I was talking about. While I know this friend’s family is fully aware, I don’t know where our mutual friends stand.

In short, while this story does contain me as a character, it is not my story to tell. Most of the post remains the same. The ending has been altered to because it tied back to the introduction.

Continue reading ““boxed in and labeled””
Doldrums

Update

Where’s the picture, you ask? I’m on my new computer and therefore none of my “stock” photos are on it, yet. I could use my Tumblr likes as I’m wont to do, but I’m thinking that’ll take too much. Besides, there’s a lot to talk about. Well, not really, but humor me.

After a several year hiatus, I picked up my “Nietzsche stories” and started writing new ones. Two, actually. They haven’t passed my test yet, but the people who read them – I forced my co-workers to read them – have commented on what works and what doesn’t. Dick Masters’s name doesn’t work – it raised eyebrows, but that’s because they don’t know the back story to the character – which I only hinted to in the second story, meant as the last story. I realized that this whole time I was attempting to write a linear tale, which it can be viewed as such, but each of them is to act as a stand alone at the same time. So I want to start in the middle and work my way out, I guess.

Thanksgiving was good, even though there was a FOTY incident that I will probably not discuss anytime soon. I tried not to let anything ruin my son’s first Thanksgiving, so we marched on. Shaun loved the food – I’m happy that he could eat the processed version of our turkey and he loved the stuffing, mashed potatoes, and sweet potatoes. He knocked out when the meal started to affect him like it does to all of us. We watched Brave as our Thanksgiving film, and it turned out better than I thought because I didn’t know what the movie was about.

After everything, I started to feel a little nauseous, so I settled down to watch Friends with Benefits, which I liked better than No Strings Attached. I would’ve ended my night by watching Anonymous, but by the time Friends with Benefits ended, I was beyond fried.

Tomorrow I wake up early to go into work, which isn’t my ideal way to spend a four-day weekend, but I’m getting paid extra so I’ll suck it up. We’re decorating the department for X-mas and we’re probably gonna fuck around for a bit. Free food is also promised so I was roped in. Besides, I can use the extra money in my X-mas present jar.

What else? Oh yeah! My new computer! It’s a HP Envy Notebook with Windows 8 and Beats Audio. So yeah. Excitement can begin.

Writing & Writers

Even when you were, you weren’t

“That’s the price you pay,” she told me. Somewhere down the road, a man hobbled down, his leg bent and broke with time. White locks blowing with the warm desert air. She threw the car in gear and pressed hard on the gas – an automatic vibrator of fury in overdrive. She nodded toward me, smirked. “You wanna see something worth watching for a change?”

The scene was cacti and tumbleweed – something out of a movie or a dull dreamer’s book. Nothing remotely interesting out there. She aimed the car at the old man. “What are you doing?” I asked.

“Just watch,” she said pushing down the pedal, zipping the car toward the unsuspecting victim. At the last moment, she blared the horn and pulled over to the side. The stunned man hobbled toward us, shuddering.

“Are you outta your mind?” he shouted. “You nearly nicked me.”

“Oh, come off it, Walter,” she said. “You weren’t in any trouble.”

The old man – Walter – jumped in the backseat. “Where we headed?”

“The city,” she said. “Nowhere in particular. And what are you doing out here in the desert?”

“Just looking for the ones who are in charge,” he said. “I have an idea on how to make this place ideal.”

“You’ll never find them,” she said. “They say they don’t exist anymore.”

“Sorta like god then, hu?” Walter chuckled. “Even here they fuck you up with their religion and philosophy.”

“There’s only one philosophy here,” she said. “You know that.”

We were miles from Boroughs now. I didn’t even bother looking at the mirror in hopes to see the looming buildings in the horizon. There wasn’t any point to it. I left it behind, or it pushed me out. “You’d think they’d solve the hunger problem,” I said. “You know, not make us hungry.”

“Even here we must dine,” said Walter. “You know what I miss though? Roasted leg of lamb. We had one every Thanksgiving instead of turkey.”

“Hell,” she said. “I miss Brussels sprouts.”

Further down the road, we past two drifters having sex under the desert sun. We spent our days this way. Driving and traveling aimlessly. Hitting one town after another. They way across the oceans lie other countries much like the ones we left behind. “Maybe one day,” she said. “We’ll see if it’s true.”

 

Music

This Post Is Lost In Confusion

I’m just gonna ahead and blurt this out – I miss Amy Winehouse. I miss her crack-addled, drunk swaggering celebrity. I dedicate this blog to her memory. As I type this, I’m listening to her album Back to Black.

I called Texas Car Title and Payday Loan earlier. Still no news. L told me that the regional manager was coming in tomorrow and they’d discuss the interviews then. She also stated that she’d call me tomorrow with the news, if any. I hate calling to see if I got a job because I feel like I’m coming off as desperate, but I know it’s expected. It shows that you’re really interested in the job. That’s why I played it safe and called today and not yesterday.

Thanksgiving is looming closer and now that we have a new stove, we’re doing it here this year. That’s not the only reason, but I’m not going to get into familial issues at this moment. That’s for a later post, if I ever can stomach the subject. Mother wanted to make a turkey roast, which, I’ve learned, is just a nice way of saying a boned turkey breast. While at HEB, I saw a duck and thought that’s what we’re having for Thanksgiving dinner (or lunch, as we always make it for lunch). Now it’s just a matter of finding a good duck recipe.

Thanksgiving this year will be made up of the usual suspects: Mom, Jyg, Izzy, (possibly) the kid and me. My brother and sister-in-law aren’t attending, as will my niece Selena. My other brother, Jay, and his family (except the kid, of course) will also be absent, but that’s something I’ve grown used to.

I’m not going to discuss why Thanksgiving is important to me at the moment. I’ll save that for another post. Oh well, I’m almost finished with Death Troopers, so I’m gonna go ahead and finish that up.