Doldrums

…and then there were these slight attacks

Let’s wind the clocks back two years when I started getting this pain in  my upper left arm. They hurt so bad that they lead me to fear for my life. The doctor tells me they’re nothing to worry about. I go home. I get off the meds. I stretch. Slowly they start to go away.

Late last week, the same uneasy feeling comes back in. True, I haven’t been getting as much exercise as I was before. True, I also haven’t been taken the best care of myself. True, the sleepless nights and the increase in stress and anxiety are probably killing my body.

I’m calling the new pains and fear clutching my chest my mini panic attacks. I’m not really sure what to make of them. People are telling me that I’m just worrying for nothing, but can one ever be so sure?

Half of me wants to head out for the doctors and see him. I know it’ll be a waste of money to some if I come out with just the same old panic attacks and lack of exercise like two years ago. I really don’t know what to do.

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