Nerd Night


For a moment there, the feeling of being back in college hits me. Books lie strewn upon my bed, each opened to a different chapter but roughly offer me the same ideas. A composition book rests open besides my journal; notes scrawled upon their pages that extend past the margins. Several tabs are opened on Chrome. And I skim each of them in hopes that the next offers more insight on the subject matter than the last. Thing is, I never placed this much effort in my college studies. Or my high school studies. Junior high? Maybe. Elementary? Possible.

Opened on my bed are the books Eberron: Campaign Setting, Complete Divine, D&D Player’s Handbook (fifth edition), and Maze of the Blue Medusa. This doesn’t include the books opened on my tablet: a 4th edition companion book that moves the D&D world into a futuristic setting and Ultramodern 5. The opened tabs hold suggestions for race/class creations. Articles that document campaigns set in the modern world. Ideas for alternate histories and futures. Amalgamated cyberpunk worlds that borrow ideas from Warhammer 40k and other RPGs. A plethora of information available for me, and it gets my blood excited.

My idea? Create the perfect setting for Zak Sabbath and Patrick Stuart’s Maze of the Blue Medusa. I didn’t want to hand off the book to Duckie after reading the first few pages. While it’s perfect for a medieval setting, I wanted something much darker and grim than that. Reading the maze’s history, images of a dystopian, cyberpunk future began to push forth in my mind. A character named Trashcan came into being. An e-mail set to the heroes began to write itself. (O.k., I haven’t thought it all the way through, but there aren’t any scrolls in the future; I figured that there’d be something resembling e-mail than a paper message.)

As I continue reading the book, the more the ideas spring into life. Originally, I was going to follow the cyberpunk system presented in a forum. Now I’m thinking of stealing bits of it, but keeping races found in 5e. And one found in 4e. And one found in the modern companion for 4e. Plus ideas from the 3.5e books.

It’ll be months before any of this is ready, I’m sure. So while we play the Book of Malor, I’ll be working on this campaign. I’ll be creating player ready characters (unless I create a micro manual for the players), lovable NPCs (Trashcan can’t last forever—yes, I already wrote his demise which will happen soon or way later, depending on when creature responsible for his death makes an appearance), and situations to put the heroes in that will cause them to get lost and separated from each other.

Nerd Night

The Adventure Thus Far

I don’t pretend to know what the hell I’m doing. I just roll with it. And if the dice comes up to my advantage, so be it. If it doesn’t—I’ll find myself running, leaping, and softly grazing a Dragonborn’s derrière. The swarm of wasps surround us, and my failed leap onto his back causes him to misfire his fire breath. I luck out because, despite of my shame of groping a fellow adventurer, my fall grants me some safety. The wasps ignore me. They go after him.


Our DM loves for bugs. Maybe disturbingly so. Since our first adventure began, we’ve combated ants, bedbugs, and now these wasps. And those are just the ones I remember. Had my character not landed flat on his face, he might have swung his tiny sword instead in hopes of at least halving a few of those buggers. But in this game of chance, there wasn’t much to choose from. Fight and get stung, or jump on a Dragonborn’s back and hope for the best.

Neither, as it turned out, was in the cards for me.

We survived this outing. Someone us managed without a scratch—or rather, a sting. At some point we might have fought a dragon. Chances are, though, it was a legion of giant armadillidiidae.

While our adventure didn’t end, Duckie decided to reboot the fragment of the multiverse he created. Marvel and DC were doing it, so why couldn’t he? My dragonborn-ass-groper hobbit halfing faded into the æther.

These days, I’ve taken on the roll of a wood gnome by the name of Frug. He’s a bard storyteller who’s adopted brother, a half-elf, searches the world for him. Of course, it’s not for a friendly family reunion. He blames Frug for the death of their sister. There might be some resentment due to sibling favoritism, as well.

Frug finds himself mixed with a band of randoms who are charged with conspiracy to assassinate royalty. They began their adventure together Saturday. Sadly, I wasn’t able to partake in person but the internet grants us so much. I noticed that playing online, while it has its perks of being involved, feels empty. It’s not the same as sitting in the midst of it all, laughing with friends, and being able to act out the parts along with the best of them.

But who knows when our adventure continues. Maybe next time, I’ll stop being so damn lazy and actually clean up.